Why am I so scared of money? 6 reasons
It took me a long time to admit that money freaks me out. Mostly because I’ve dealt with this fear through avoidance—avoiding looking at my bank account, keeping a huge balance in my checking account so I don’t have to make a budget, putting off calling Fidelity for as long as possible, and foregoing big purchases even if they’re important.
The crazy part is… financially, I’m doing just fine.
I make a decent living. I’ve never had credit card debt. I have a Roth IRA, HSA, 401(k), and compared to a lot of people, I’m doing well. Still, I have this crushing anxiety that not only disrupts my life, but keeps money on the table that could be spent or invested.
To get to the root of all this, I decided to write out what I believe compared to what’s actually true.
Fear #1: Financial advisors will think I’m stupid
Truth: Most people don’t know a ton about finance, which is why we have advisors. So far, I’ve found advisors to be really kind and more than happy to explain things.
Fear #2: I like my current lifestyle, but if look closer at my account, I might find I’m overspending
Truth: I’ve never had credit card debt or a $0 balance in my bank account, so it’s safe to assume I’m not spending too much. In fact, I might actually be leaving money on the table.
Fear #3: I should be doing things with my money now that I’m not, and I’ll regret it when I’m older
Truth: This could be true, but avoiding my finances is only going to make this more likely.
Fear #4: If I make one wrong financial decision, I’ll be screwed
Truth: I’d have to take some pretty big swings for one financial decision to ruin my life. In fact, the point of diversifying an investment portfolio is to balance out risk. Plus, younger people have more time to make up losses.
Fear #5: The other shoe is going to drop and I’ll lose everything
Truth: I’m not in the financially unstable home I grew up in anymore, which is where this fear comes from. I’m already creating a more financially stable life.
Fear #6: Dealing with my finances will be boring and hard
Truth: ADHD does make it harder for me to focus things on I find uninteresting, but finance isn’t as complicated as I’ve been led to believe. Getting on the phone with an advisor has proven to be a quick and easy way to understand things and make decisions.
What I learned from this exercise is that the story I’m telling myself about money is literally just that: a story. The fears holding me back have proven to be either untrue or very manageable.
Am I going to stop all my avoiding behaviors immediately? Probably not. But as the saying goes, awareness is the first step towards change.
If you relate to any of this, I encourage you to take the first step too!
Photo by Caleb Woods on Unsplash